The Contractions of Birthing a Post-Colonial World

Finding words that appropriately address this moment in time feels impossible. What a trip to be launching my first YouTube show as the last of the social contracts we thought we could count on get thrown out the window by the "leaders" and "public servants" meant to protect them.

And yet, from the depths of my heart and soul, I want you to know that my livestream Crowning is birthing to meet this moment, not in spite of it.

When I say "birthing is a portal to your power," I am offering the wisdom I've been so humbled to learn as a birth doula. The moment of crowning is when baby's head becomes visible and the birthing person meets the threshold of their power. It's at this threshold that fear, doubt, and fatigue approach and attempt to lure the birthing person away from what they've come here to do, but the only way out is through.

In a childbirth setting, this is when I hold my client, look into their eyes, co-regulate through breath, and remind them through words and touch just how capable they are of continuing through to the other side. I remind them that they are about to meet their baby and turn them back toward themselves and their power.

I've been thinking a lot about the birthing of a different world as the current system fights for its life. If I'm looking at it from a "stages of labor" perspective, I honestly can't tell where we're at in the process. Of course, that's very common in my doula experience, too. There have been times I think we have hours and baby comes almost faster than the team can arrive, as well as times I think we're so close and don't meet baby for another day.

Birthing is a dance between mother and baby at a pace that is collaborative and mysterious. It's impossible to guess which push will be the one that sends the baby across the threshold. Each contraction presents an opportunity for the birthing person to expand—to meet themselves in their depths and breathe with trust that eventually the baby will be Earthside.

And when the crowning happens, most clients express doubt in their ability to make it through.

If I'm being honest, sometimes in these moments, doubt plants itself in me, too. Not because I've ever doubted my client's ability to follow through, but because I understand that this is something they can only do for themselves. The birth story is between themselves and their baby, and no matter how much I believe in them, it's not about what I believe.

There have been times I've wondered as a birth doula if this will be a situation that calls for a hospital transfer, cesarean, or other intervention. Sometimes it does lead to that and that's okay, but this is where my childbirth analogy ends.

Because unlike a labor room, there is no anesthesia or forceps that can carry us through this moment into the world our children, and the generations after them, will need.

As we experience the desperate attempts of this current empire to hold tight to its power, it's been hard to not feel like the walls are closing in. Witnessing footage of Renee Good's murder by ICE, reading stories of children being tear gassed, and hearing [alleged] confirmation of the U.S. president’s sex crimes—it sickens me to even name these things in this sacred space, yet I also refuse to contribute to the normalizing of these crimes against humanity. It reminds me of the reality that I'm not imagining it. The walls ARE closing in. We are contracting.

We are being asked to meet these contractions with our own expansion. A transitioning world demands a different kind of leadership—one that is resourced, embodied, and self-directed.

So the question becomes: how do I expand alongside these contractions? How do I offer myself the same informed, intuitive, and individualized care I so readily give to others?

I stay informed while tending to my nervous system—engaging with evidence-based information while still caring for myself before consuming the news through gentle movement, singing, or meditation. This helps me engage with the realities of the world without letting it consume or derail me from my role for change.

I filter everything through my intuition, paying attention to what resonates, what doesn't, and letting my body be the final authority in how I move in alignment.

I honor my individualized path. Just as there is no one-size-fits-all birth plan, there is no single right way to navigate these times. My calling is uniquely mine and it gets lost when I follow what others say I should be doing right now.

All three of these aspects work together to guide me through each contraction, change, and transition.

In the birth room, time and space feel extra liminal and stretched as we approach that crowning moment. Lately, I've felt that in many ways. Like everyone else, I am dancing in the process of birthing the next paradigm together with you and the energy that connects us all. Together we can and will see the other side: the birth of the most liberated and loving world we can imagine.

If you're doubting your ability to navigate this collective moment as you simultaneously navigate your personal path, I invite you to join me on Crowning—my weekly YouTube livestream where I bring us back to ourselves and our power. Whether you need words of comfort and empowerment from another parent who gets it or you have a specific question for me to answer live, I'm there every Wednesday at 1pm PT. The show lives on my channel for whenever you need it.

We may not know which contraction will lead to our crowning moment, but we can return to our breaths, our bodies, and the wisdom that lives within us. I hope we all get to witness the world we're birthing together and watch it grow before our eyes.